Baby Sitting World

In a prior post, I talked about this situation and how I had actually experienced it from the babysitter’s side.  There was a toddler in my daycare that was with me 40-50 hours per week.  I loved her and treated her as my own child.  The result of this was that she began calling me “Mama” and cried when her mother took her from me to bring her home at night. 

While this is a heartbreaking scenario that many mothers experience, mother’s dealing with this should try to take comfort in knowing that their child must be being well taken care of and well loved to form such an attachment to his or her babysitter or nanny.   It is so hard for most mothers to trust another person to care for their baby, especially when well meaning friends repeat old cliches to them like “nobody is going to love your baby like you do.”  Apparently, there are many childcare providers that can come darn close and this is proven when this scenario happens and the baby begins calling the sitter “Mama.”

Mothers should also understand that this is just a stage and their child will soon understand who is their real mother. Then he will be both happy to arrive at daycare and happy when his mother arrives to take him home.  Some children even get to a point where they kick and scream when they are dropped off with the very same childcare provider that they used to call “Mama.” 

Though you can’t force a child to stop calling the nanny “Mommy,” you can take steps to shorten this stage.

• Try to avoid working extra hours during this time if possible so you can spend more time with your child when you get home at night.
• Try to make the time you have together quality time.  It’s hard to be patient after you’ve just worked a full day and probably spent a considerable amount of time in traffic or commuting, but taking time to sit down and cuddle your baby on your lap while reading a story or singing nursery rhymes will help strengthen your bond.
• If you need to cook dinner during those few hours you have with your little one in the evening, try to include her as opposed to putting her in a playpen or exersaucer while you prepare dinner.  Try putting her in a high chair next to you so you can talk to her while you still get dinner on the table.
• Bedtime may not be negotiable due to time restraints of getting out of the house in the morning, but if possible, an extra half hour of play time with mommy and daddy is a significant amount of time to a little one.

If you’ve tried all of these to no avail, try to be patient – it’s just a stage. 

Children go through many different stages with regard to almost everything.  They will suddenly detest foods they once couldn’t get enough of.  A toy they never had interest in will become their most prized possession overnight.  Some children who seemed like they never slept begin sleeping through the night plus take two naps during the day.  One thing’s for sure, almost anything can change in an instant when dealing with children!

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

When you think of babysitting, whether you are the babysitter or the parent, do you consider whether or not the children will be outside while they are in your care or the care of the sitter? 

In many parts of the country and in many parts of the world for that matter, the weather can change often from hour to hour.  A bright sunny day can change quickly to a stormy afternoon complete with thunder and lightning.  A snowstorm can break way to a clear blue sunny sky.  Warm summer air can drop numerous degrees in a matter of minutes with a sudden gust of wind from an approaching cold front. 

“What does this have to do with babysitting?”

When you are babysitting, YOU are in charge of taking care of the children.  Protecting them from sun, cold, rain etc. is your job.  Parents are busy people.  They have thousands of things to remember between working and/or taking care of the house, and caring for their kids with their often overloaded schedules and just plain daily maintenance!  If Mrs. Jones has left for work for the day and forgot to leave the sunscreen out, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want you to put sunscreen on the children before taking them outside.  However, you do need to discuss this with parents and get their permission.

Some parents may not want you applying sunscreen to their children.  Perhaps one of them is allergic to sunscreen.  Maybe the mother prefers to do it herself so she’s sure you haven’t missed a spot.  Whatever the reason may be is not important.  Making sure you follow the parents request is!  Keep in mind though, that you also need to think wisely.  For instance, if a parent says she doesn’t want you to use sunscreen on  her children, then taking them to the playground between the hours of 10:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m. on a hot summer day is not a good idea.

Lots of children love the outdoors.  They love to play in the dirt with rocks and sticks, they like to dig in the sand, and they love to explore nature.  But, many of them prefer not to wear a jacket regardless of the temperature.  This is another instance where the sitter is required to use her best judgement.  Just because a child says they aren’t cold, doesn’t mean they should be allowed to run around without a jacket on a cold day.  If there are puddles outside or the ground is wet and muddy, the kids need to wear boots.  If their hands and fingers are red after being outside just a short time, they need mittens or gloves.  If it is raining or snowing, they need hats or hoods.

Adhering to parent’s requests and using your best judgement as well, will help to keep the children you are caring for safe and healthy.

As an added measure, keep a bottle of hypoallergenic sunscreen, a pair of kids mittens, and a small travel size umbrella in your babysitting kit!  Always try to be prepared for anything!

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

Ahhh, Valentines Day!  A day especially for celebrating love, whether you are dating, engaged, in another type of relationship, or married!  Many couples use February 14thas a day to celebrate and express their love for each other in some way out of the ordinary.  Some couples will wed on this most wonderful day, while others will simply celebrate with candy, flowers, gifts, or a night out to some place special.   If they choose to go out and either one or both of them have children, they will all share something in common – they will need a babysitter!

If you happen to be a babysitter, be aware that New Years Eve and Valentines Day are two days when you may increase your hourly rates.  These are days when your services will be in high demand and charging time and a half is not out of the ordinary.  If you are a parent or guardian, you should start looking for a sitter at least a month in advance to be sure you get the sitter you want.

If you don’t go out very often or usually have family or friends who care for your children in your absence, then you may not even know where to look for a babysitter if you are now in need of one. The best local sitters are at Sittercity.com.  Sittercity has thousands of sitters available all over the country.  Just click the link and fill in your zip code to view the babysitters available right in your area.  Also, Sittercity is offering a special promotion to take 15% off with promo code “SAVE15″ now through Valentines Day!  You can try the newspaper classifieds, but why wait?  Click on the link, enter your zip code, and you can view potential sitters from the comfort of your own home.

Babysitting services like Sittercity, provide you with information like age, level of experience, rates, and often a photo,  background check, and/or comments from other parents who have used their services.  Find your next sitter now!  And Happy Valentines Day!

With Christmas day right around the corner, it got me thinking about one little reminder for babysitters.  Children stop believing in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, etc. at different ages.  It is never up to the babysitter to tell a child they’re caring for that any or all of those wonderful magical beings don’t exist.   Whether or not it is or was part of the sitter’s own belief system at one time, it is not her duty to divulge the truth even if the child asks her about it. 

Religion plays a huge part in the lives of some people and little or no part in the lives of others.  With the parents permission, it is ok for a babysitter to teach the children she’s caring for about her religion or culture if it differs from theirs.  But, teaching children that their religion or culture is wrong, evil, or inferior is never acceptable. 

The babysitter’s job is to take care of the children, keeping them safe while their parents are out.   If the sitter encounters an issue where a child she is caring for asks a question that she isn’t sure she should answer, the babysitter should either give a neutral answer, avoid actually answering the question directly, or tell the child she needs to think about it and will answer her the next time she babysits.  Then she should discuss it with the parents when they return home and ask them how they would like her to handle it.

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

So many babysitters love and hate bedtime when they are caring for children.  They love it because then the bulk of the work is done and they can relax the rest of the night.  But, they also hate it because most children refuse to go quietly.  They throw fits, beg & plead, try to strike bargains, and sometimes just  flat out refuse to go to bed.

Sitters can greatly improve their chances of having the children go off to bed without much of a fuss by trying these simple ideas.

• Clarify with parents what “bedtime is 8:00″ actually means.  Do they mean you should start the bedtime routine at 8:00 or do they want their children’s heads on their pillows at 8:00?
• Start bedtime routines early.  Find blankies or other security items soon after you arrive and leave them in the child’s bed so that there isn’t an hour of “search and rescue” at bedtime.
• Avoid playing games or engaging in activities right before bed that gets the children’s adrenaline pumping.  Stick to activities like doing puzzles, reading books, or drawing pictures right before bed.
• Remember that going to bed is not an option.  But, what they do before they go to sleep can be.  If the parents want their children’s heads on their pillows at 8:00, they get them into their beds by 7:45 and let them choose what they want to do until 8:00.  Give them the options like read or look at books, play with a doll or stuffed animal, or even listen to music or recorded stories.  Some parents allow handheld games in bed as well.  But you should try to avoid this option because children often have trouble stopping the game when told to do so.  There may be another whole set of objections.  For instance, “I’m right in the middle of a game,” or I need to complete this level,” or “If I stop it now I can’t save my game and I’ll have to start all over again tomorrow.”

Remember that bedtime is not an option, and giving in to pleading to stay up later will just reinforce the behavior of begging to stay up every time you babysit that same child.  Sticking to bedtime routines and times will make getting children off to bed easier and almost effortless each time you babysit.

Most of us have witnessed this scenario before….. a child receives a gift for a birthday, holiday, etc.,  and after ripping off the paper and ribbon, and removing it from the box, the child puts the gift aside and plays with the paper, ribbon, and box!   Children LOVE boxes!

If you have the room to store them, consider saving boxes of all sizes.  Take them out on a rainy day or after children get bored with the toys in their toybox.  They are guaranteed to have a ball playing with them.   Babysitters:  you too can collect boxes and bring them along babysitting to provide hours of fun for the children.  While you probably wouldn’t drag a refrigerator box down the street to your client’s home, you might be able to carry several smaller boxes, especially if they can fit one inside of the other.

• Shirt boxes don’t hold up very well, but they can still be used to cut up for picture frames or other crafts. 
• Small jewelry boxes are great for tiny treasures, especially if they are lined jewelry boxes as opposed to cardboard.  But, kids love the small cardboard ones as well!
• Shoe sized boxes are great for storing crayons and markers and other small toys, but are also great for making dioramas and houses for tiny dolls or stuffed animals. 
• Then, of course, if you have a box large enough for a child to fit in, then the ideas are endless.  Depending on the size of the box, it can be anything from a shipping crate delivering a wild animal to a local zoo, to a club house complete with windows and doors.

The boxes alone are fun enough, but you can also give the children markers or crayons, and any other craft items to decorate them. Let their imaginations run wild transforming the boxes into anything they can dream up!  Let the children decide what to create but offer suggestions to help spark their imaginations if they seem to be at a loss for ideas.

Always assist children if they want holes or flaps cut in the cardboard.  Depending on how thick it is, cardboard can be difficult to cut and a child could easily injure himself.

Parents:  Before you throw away boxes to toys or games, if you won’t be using them for the children to play with, consider whether or not it would make a good storage container for the toy when it is not in use.  Boxes are much easier to stack and store than the toy itself.  It also helps to keep parts, pieces, and instructions all in one place.

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

Some holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving are generally “family holidays” where the children go wherever the parents go, so a babysitter is rarely needed.  But, other holidays like New Years Eve and Valentines Day put sitters in high demand.  If you are a babysitter and you frequently babysit for more than one family, then plan your babysitting on holidays in advance.   You can and should  get paid a higher rate on New Years Eve and Valentines Day especially.

If you are a sitter on the younger side and don’t have a boyfriend or significant other yet, then you may not be concerned about babysitting on these two holidays in particular.  But, you should still be able to charge holiday rates even though you aren’t giving up a night out.  The holiday rate is up to you.  But if it is too high, nobody will hire you. 

You could probably charge anywhere from a couple of dollars more per hour to double your regular rate of pay depending on where you live.  A babysitter in New York City will more than likely be able to get several times her regular pay on New Years Eve, while a sitter who lives in a small quiet town far from any major city might only receive a couple of dollars extra per hour.

In an earlier post, I mentioned that having an email connection with the parents you babysit for is important.  This is one reason that it may be helpful to have email addresses.  A couple of months before a holiday, you could send out an email to all the people who you generally babysit for, telling them about your holiday rates.  This will also prompt parents to call and book you early so you can plan your schedule.

Another idea is to make up a flier ahead of time to give to new clients.  When parents meet with you for an interview or even if they didn’t interview you and just have you come to babysit, it would be helpful if you had a flier to give them.  It could include your regular and holiday rates, your availability, your experience, and any other pertinent information.  This may be a big help for you if you are uncomfortable discussing how much you would like to get paid. 

If you are an excellent sitter, be sure you get paid what you’re worth.  Check out what other babysitters in your area get paid when figuring out your rates, by checking out an online babysitting rate calculator, checking the ads in the classifieds, or by just asking friends or people you know that babysit or hire babysitters for their own kids.  Remember that rates can vary greatly from town to town.

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

Have you ever thought about the benefits of having your baby-sitter’s email address if you’re a parent, or your client’s email address if you are a babysitter?  Well there are benefits to both parties. 

If you are a parent, the more methods of communication you have available to your for your sitter, the better.  Even if you have the baby sitter’s home phone number and her cell phone number, her email address may still be helpful. 

I can remember several times that I kept meaning to call the babysitter to schedule her for a particular event, but I would have so much going on everyday that I would keep forgetting.  It usually happened that I would finally remember when it was too late at night to call.  I was never comfortable leaving messages on answering machines, because so often they were picked up by other family members and deleted and the sitter never knew I called.  Many times I was unable to go to an event because I was waiting for a sitter to call me back when she never even received the message that I called.

Email is great if your sitter uses it and checks it frequently.  You can still call but also send a confirmation email with start time for the night and other details.  Then, if you remember at 11:00 at night that you were supposed to call the babysitter, you can just send her an email that won’t disturb her or her family.

If you are a babysitter, it would also be a good idea for you to have your client’s email address.  One great reason for this, is because if you needed to discuss something or ask something without the kids hearing you this is the perfect solution.  For example, if you wanted to take the kids out for an ice cream and you asked the parents when you arrived at their home in the presence of the children, there may be some major meltdowns or tantrums if the parents say no.  I’m sure the parents wouldn’t be thrilled to deal with this sort of situation right before they head out for the night.

Always confirm dates and times with your client or sitter as the date approaches, especially if you’ve booked it more than a week in advance.  A telephone call is quick and easy.  But if you don’t connect with the person you are calling, leave a message and then follow up with a text or email to be sure they got the message.  Using two forms of communication and confirming plans is a smart idea.

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

Many children have a security blanket or comfort item – something they sleep with or carry around.  For most, it is a blanket, for many it is a stuffed animal, but there are countless other items that children treasure. 

It may be difficult for a babysitter to understand the importance of a comfort item.  Perhaps she never had one as a child, or maybe she doesn’t remember the importance of it and how it made her feel.  Parents usually understand completely and return it to the child’s bed every time they find it lying around the house so that it is sure to be where they need it at bedtime.

If a child you babysit for has a comfort item that he takes to bed every night and the parents have forgotten to locate it for you before they left, you should make it the first order of business.  Take the time early in the evening to perform a “search and rescue mission” for the blankie or whatever it is.  Don’t wait until it is bedtime when the child is tired and cranky and you might be a little tired and cranky yourself.  This will make bedtime go much more smoothly. 

Avoid saying things like, “It’s just a blanket.  Go to sleep; you can find it in the morning!”  Yes, to all of us, it is JUST a blanket, but to the child who holds it dear to his heart, it is essential.

The same holds true for pacifiers.  If you are babysitting a baby who needs his pacifier to fall asleep, make sure you locate it as soon as you arrive or you may wish you didn’t have ears if you can’t find it at bedtime!

Weaning children off of comfort items is up to the parents.  I know people who took their blankies to college with them!  Though you are acting in the parents place when you are babysitting, you shouldn’t ever change household rules or take it upon yourself to try to wean a child off of a pacifier, bottle, comfort item, etc. unless the parents ask you to.  Sometimes, the parents need the comfort item more than the child!

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert

I was checking out a couple of online babysitting services the other day and I noticed something that I thought was interesting.  First of all, most babysitters posted a picture of themselves (this is a really good idea) but some only posted a profile.  Even though everybody knows that “you can’t judge a book by its cover” people still want to see a face when searching for a child care provider.  Personally, I would look at all the sitters with photos first and would only look at the profiles without photos if I couldn’t find the type of sitter I was looking for in the group with photos.

Next, if you do plan on posting a photo with your profile on an online babysitting service’s website, please post an appropriate photo.  Many of the photos I saw were great.  They were photos of the babysitter smiling and usually holding a child.  Those photos to me said, “Hi, I babysit and I love it!”  This is the message you want to send. 

 Then I came across a photo with two girls in it.  The first problem was that you couldn’t tell from the photo which one was the babysitter described in the profile.  The second problem was that the girls in the picture were making faces trying to look cool, sexy, or whatever, and holding up their fingers giving the peace sign.  The photo appeared to have been from someone’s profile on a social networking site.  Attention Babysitters – this is NOT the type of photo you want to post on a babysitting services website.

While I was on these sites, I checked out the “Pet Sitter” sections.  I found it strange that there appeared to be a large number of teenage looking mothers on these sites wanting to find work as pet sitters.  I thought to myself, “why are these young girls posting photos of themselves with their babies on their profiles?  Could it be that they are trying to show that they have a child so if they are capable of caring for a child then they can certainly take care of your pet?  Could it be that they hope people will hire them figuring they really need the money because they have a baby to support?”   

It wasn’t until several hours later when I was still running it through my head that I figured it out.  These girls were babysitters and just used the same photo on their pet sitting profile as they did on their babysitting profile.  Attention Babysitters:  don’t do this!  If the site allows you to upload a different photo with each profile whether it is for babysitting, pet sitting, tutoring, or elder care, take advantage and use different photos.  If it is a tutoring profile you’ve posted, you might want to post either just a picture of yourself or a picture of you tutoring a school-aged child.  For pet sitting, again you can post a picture of just yourself, or a picture of you holding a puppy, having a dog give you his paw, you with a bird sitting on your shoulder, etc.   You get the idea!

If you don’t have the time to upload several different pictures, one for each profile, then use one photo for all of them but it should be a photo of  just you, preferably a head shot, smiling, and in focus.  Take a good look at your picture before you post it and be sure it is sending the message you meant to send!

Wishing you the best of luck!

Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert